Client Story: “A dream is useless unless acted upon.”
“A dream is useless unless acted upon.”
Do you believe this is true?
We’re not taught how to hold our dreams loosely.
Much less that there could be value in doing so.
We’re taught to commit, to put blinders on, buckle down, and burn the boats. Essentially, we’re expected to close ourselves off from alternative possibilities.
This might be good advice in certain situations or for certain periods of time.
But what happens when your circumstances change, either intentionally or unexpectedly? How do you build a new boat if all of your resources have been allocated towards a goal that’s no longer viable?
I would sincerely hope that, in such circumstances, you’d at least be aware of other possible Ideas.
A few months back, a client and I played with the belief that “a dream is useless unless acted upon.” This client, Ted Everson, has given me permission to share this story.
Ted is a natural visionary - both in his life and work. From building his business and team of 10 to designing a custom treehouse with his daughter, Ted has a proven ability to turn Ideas into reality. Through our coaching, his intention was to hone this innate skill, saying, "Because this is a strength, it doesn't get worked on in the same way.”
In one of our conversations, Ted mentioned that “a dream is useless unless acted upon.”
There’s both logic and merit in this way of thinking.
Ted acknowledged that this thought likely stemmed from a “time is money” mindset, one that kept him focused on the goal at hand. This utilitarian approach, this action-oriented rule, has served him in many ways.
As I’ve mentioned in the past, rules aren’t inherently bad. But, they are inherently limiting.
So, in the spirit of honing his skill as a visionary, we took this thought to The Work of Byron Katie and asked:
Is it true that “a dream is useless unless acted upon”? Y/N
Can you absolutely know that this thought is true? Y/N
What happens when you believe this thought?
Who would you be without this thought?
Through this line of questioning, Ted noticed that he’s quick to “cut and run,” to shut his dreams down if they seem outlandish or when the next action isn’t clear.
But, he also acknowledged that dreaming can be a source of joy, play, creativity, and connection… regardless of action. It’s a way for the mind to rest and restore.
Ted and his family were leaving for vacation the following week, and he planned to dedicate a portion of that time to dreaming by the open water, leveraging the vastness and novelty of his vacation environment to channel new and bigger Ideas. Ted committed to taking “two steps closer to outlandish” while dreaming and to replace any action-oriented obligation with observation.
When he returned, I asked Ted what it was like to take those two steps closer to outlandish and what he observed as he did so. He noticed that the question changed from “Could we do this?” (aka “Is it outlandish?”) to “Do we actually want to do this…?”
Somewhere in those two extra steps, free from obligation, he gained clarity he didn’t have before.
His mind opened to a new possibility. By giving himself permission to play with his “outlandish” Idea, he created space for certain dreams to exist as options at the periphery instead of doggedly pursuing one singular path. He learned to hold this dream lightly and loosely, and in his own words, “When the time comes, it will become clear if we want this thing or not.”
For some, the pressure to choose one path and pursue it exhaustively is paralyzing. Others are caught off-guard by changing circumstances and find themselves stranded in a place they no longer desire to be.
In either case, an ability to adapt, to flex the muscles of possibly, would be immensely valuable. Imagine having access to or being able to turn your attention toward other Ideas that you’ve practiced holding lightly and loosely.
I’m reminded of this quote from Suzanne Eder’s book What You Want Wants You: “There is no destination, no end point. There is only creating and experiencing, creating and experiencing, creating and experiencing, in endless unique ways.”
After three months of coaching, here’s what Ted had to say about his experience:
“The coaching sessions with Sarah helped open my eyes to a different way to vision/dream for myself and my business. I had always believed that "a dream is useless unless acted upon." This limited my ability to think bigger as we worked on viewing these dreams with more of an observatory view. By holding these dreams more lightly and loosely, we were able to see more value from what was being dreamed up - while not immediately taking action - still learning from these somewhat outlandish visions for life and business. I enjoyed learning how to flex these muscles more than I previously allowed for myself. I appreciated the dedicated time and the open-ended conversations that seemed to always find their mark on what truly matters.”
